Most of us have stayed home full-time for many months. As if married life wasnt hard enough already (separate toothpaste tubes since your partner doesnt squeeze it right, anyone? I would not be able to handle quarantine if I was. 2. Offers may be subject to change without notice. Its been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes. He started working as a visual advertisement producer in 2017 and worked there for almost two years. Please grab a box of tissues and enjoy the marriage TRUTH I'm about to drop on ya these marriage tweets will make your day! If I wanted to feel trapped and confused for an hour, Id ask my husband to explain how Bitcoin works. Rather than taking every disagreement so seriously, try to use some humor to lighten the mood and allow both of you to see that you dont need to be so serious and uptight about things. Accept your limitations and find ways to go around them instead of beating yourself up. Surgeon: I can't find the clot Me: Every other Monday, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the last two weeks. You cant expect your spouse to read your mindthis eventually leads to resentment, arguments, and binge-eating ice cream. This is so true. Me and my husband have been married for over 11yrs. Distractify is a registered trademark. Is the concept of humor beyond so many people? Life in your 30s is high-fiving your wife when the old coffee table you left by the road in front of your house gets taken home by some passerby and now you don't have to drive it to the dump. That's right: funny tweets about being married. I decided to contact him because I love my wife so much and we have been apart for a couple of months I really missed her so much, I have tried all other means to get her back but couldn't. Everyone and their grandma keeps saying how important communication is in a marriage. Me, giving my husbands eulogy: Its so hard And sorry to any Cheryls out there, but Cheryl is the perfect name for an imaginary coworker to blame things on. Oh god yes.If the family is close and there gonna be around frequently, listen to their chewing too. Either way, the object will only be found after I stand up. Me: So you go back to the office for work. Sure, marriage is about love, trust and the occasional romantic date nightbut it's mostly about all-weekend Netflix binges, yelling to each other from opposite ends of the house . Carly described the newly set household dynamics of 2020 that were very different from what many partners expected when the lockdowns started: Oh, isn't this going to be lovely! MIL: You have to teach them really young to pick up after themselves Copyright 2023 Distractify. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. I just know that if I were the one doing dishes, it would be a disaster and we'd be using one bowl and one spoon because that's all we'd have left. After 6 weeks of quarantine: husband is annoying. Do you truly believe that is what represents the majority? ", DATING: cant wait to see you again for our defence, we are both quite geeky and love to be at home, in general, doing on our crafty things then doing a little show and tell session to show the other the progress on our crafts even though none of us really have a clue about what the other is really talking about :) It s great!!! Below, check out 50 of the best ones that will have you laughing into 2022. Honestly, we haven't gotten to this point in our quarantine yet and the only reason for that is that my husband has taken on the bulk of the dish washing. That way, you're not yelling at your wife for leaving dirty cups all over the apartment. I love this for her. Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! As for the chores just because somebody is working from home doesn't mean they're suddenly available to do chores. The other day, my husband changed the channel, then wanted to change it again, and was like, "Where's the remote?" You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Me: Can you hand me that clip?Husband: Can you please buy some actual hair clips? Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? And she just screams at me all the time.Welcome to my world The Salty Mamas (@saltymamas) April 17, 2020 And they marry each other. Honestly, that is a good answer though. Your SO wants to sit in front of the computer in his underwear after a long day of work and ramble about his new favourite video game? But first and foremost, how do they escape when they spend nearly 24/7 with their tormentor? My husband just shushed me. Also, the Cheetos are MINE NOW. Carly believes it may have to do with a disproportionate share of housework and childcare that falls on females in heterosexual households. @simoncholland, Marriage teaches you a lot about yourself. Error occurred when generating embed. Check out even more. (Closed), I Make Micro Crochet Toys That Fit In A Tiny Glass Bottle (35 Pics). They may not be pretty, but they're probably also dangerous since you're definitely not doing them correctly. Start writing! And do I really have to live with this person forever?" during the quarantine. Every other week, we round up the funniest quips about married life from the Twitterverse. They are not ignoring each other or taking each other for granted if they spend many hours apart in the house or apartment. In his spare time, he creates graphic collages and even had his first artwork exhibition at "Devilstone". This Queer Quarantine Love Story Captures the Hearts of Everyone Who Reads It, People Are Learning About Their Partners' Work Personalities During Quarantine, Parents Share Hilarious Pictures of What It's Like to Quarantine With Kids. I miss sleeping and rely on coffee and laughter to get me through the day. Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? My husband just said, "Okey dokey, Artichokey," and now I'm wondering if anyone can recommend a good divorce lawyer. Does that mean I have to do that thing he likes? So communicate. Marriage is full of highs, lows and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between. I have to say, though, that quarantine is not the time to start nitpicking about your partner's habits out loud. I'd say that's a plus. Marriage. Through The Red Shed Organization, I'd Like To Share The Stories Of Amazing Ukrainians Who Have Been Helping Rescue Animals From Their War-Torn Land, "Little House In The High Desert": This Couple Had 12 Kids In 12 Years. I should probably buy him something soon. Source: Sony Pictures Releasing / Twitter. That means someone dies every 2 minutes from COVID. Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. Discover unique things to do, places to eat, and sights to see in the best destinations around the world with Bring Me! Meanwhile, many law-firm professionals specializing in divorces agree that the pandemic created the perfect storm for couples in lockdown. Every other week, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the previous 14 days. Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? I do all the cooking/cleaning as my lady just has no skill in the field..she made a great adult film actress though! Marriage is having separate tubes of toothpaste because your spouse squeezes it wrong. So I get this. According to Saxbe, people arent used to spending all day, every day inside their homes. Listen: I just found out that my husband eats spaghetti with a spoon so I cant listen to your problems right now. For couples that have a healthy relationship, that are doing pretty well, there are some ways this could bring people closer together, Saxbe said about couples who can figure out how to weather this pandemic together. Snoring will never help your argument. Did the virus suck all the intelligence out of the country? I know it's true love because starting at 5am his alarm goes off like 4 times every single day, and he's still alive. Turns out that my husband knew how to clean thoroughly this whole time. Could I stay with you for just a couple of days? My husband put the toilet paper on the roll. Me: Im in no mood for your riddles today. Twitter/@JustinGuarini. Same in my house, we're happy and trying to make the most of this time. Maryfairyboberry (@MaryJustice86) March 30, 2020 2 So lets see what twenty twenty (w)one had in it for us to laugh at. @simoncholland, In 34 years on this planet, Ive learned one very important lesson that Im going to pass on to you fellas. Wife (to kids): Wait till your father comes home!! You can not eat her fries. Day. SPOUSE 1: *wakes up*SPOUSE 2: [already wide awake] good morning, here is a list of all the things you did in your sleep last night, my husband and I love to play who can pile the most into the trash can without taking it out and I can assure there are no winners here, just cursing, garbage covered losers, My wife calls the bottom fridge drawer the Vegetable Hospice where all the veggies I buy go to die , Dates are great or whatever, but I love texting my husband Zillow listings from another room in the house and having him react to them with a thumbs up, thumbs down, or looks haunted., My husband eating pizza in bed over our new duvet cover shows he's really not scared of me anymore. Secondly, alone time helps people focus on other things and activities that dont involve their spouses. Ah, yes, a classic game. But whether we're talking about the ordinary or the extraordinary, some spouses find a way to treat marriage with a healthy dose of humor. Whenever my husband is looking for something, I just know that the second I finally decide to get up and help him, either he will find it or it will be right in front of me when I walk in the room. Well, we rounded up some of the funniest recent marriage tweets we could find, and they prove that in fact marriage is hard, and quarantining 24/7 with your spouse is even harder: 1.. Most stay at home orders contain provisions for seeking safety- especially from domestic violence. He was obsessed with playing and making music in his teens. Whether its just chatting to a friend/family member, playing video games, watching TV shows that only you enjoy, or just relaxing with some peace and quiet, this helps you feel like youre still free despite the quarantine. Just what I needed this morning to start the week. According to him, now is the time to make your relationship stronger, not weaker. ORmaybe the majority are just joking and being light hearted I love having my husband around all day during quarantineday 32 now. Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Funny Marriage Quarantine TweetsTry Not To Laugh Challenge To Get Notification Whenever We Have A New Video.Music:https://www.epidemicsound.com/For copy. Dont forget to check out our funny quotes about love. Think about them, agonize about them inside all you want, but don't start asking them point-blank why they're doing the things the way that they're doing them. He will be missed. In normal times it is already hard for the victims to escape or get respite. Made it to that level of marriage where you get in trouble for being able to fall asleep so fast. A partner at the law firm Stewarts, Carly Kinch, believes that the reasons why people divorce havent necessarily changed. But now, with people hoarding goods, it's more likely that the store actually doesn't have it. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Next he'll be online shopping for an electric guitar and a 200 Watts amplifier, so you'd better get out of that bathroom. Many partners benefited from more quality time spent together, many initiated new hobbies and found common things to engage in together. Had to fake an injury to get out of doing some of these chores Ive been telling my wife I would do as soon as I had the time. Express your thoughts and feelings. The boredom is real, people. Feb 27, 2023, 03:34 PM EST. My husband annoyed me last night so I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning. LOL. Okay this one would piss me off. The past year has had its share of ups and downs. I definitely have. If anything, the boundaries have just disappeared altogether. I think it's because women usually try to put themselves together a little bit before they appear on screen whereas men literally don't care. Usually, we get our social needs met by lots of people and not just our spouse. My wife is loosing her mind, who the fu*k eats a kitkat like this??? Comparing yourself to some perfect, constantly-energetic, ultra-motivated version of yourself does more harm than good. She microwaved fish. @ericspiegelman, Marriage, because you need to know you were folding a bag of chips wrong your entire life. It was always a problem, but now that we're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it's worse than ever. A huge fan of literature, films, philosophy, and tabletop games, he also has a special place in his heart for anything related to fantasy or science fiction. We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing. But whats been indeed a change was the significant increase in women who are initiating divorces. @iwearaonesie, Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didnt want to share. For instance, Ive learned that I dont need to use so many paper towels, and theyre expensive. Id say marriage is going great :), Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. This guy probably has a job and bills to pay, yet he does stuff like this. I think he's embarrassed that he has so many questions. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Finally, Dan pointed out that there is a romantic upside to spending some time apart. 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After getting his bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design, he tried to succeed in digital design, advertising, and branding.Also, Denis really enjoys sports and loves everything related to board sports and water. I'm definitely more her speed. It's Cheryl's fault! Long story short, how long should I wait before I tell him it arrives tomorrow? Wife: I need some chicken stock.Me: okay. Marriage is hard but when you are with the right person like I am it is sweeter. But for couples who are struggling or dont communicate as well or dont share the same values, this situation is going to drive a wedge or exacerbate whatever tension is already there.. I love this idea. JUST LEAVE THE GROCERIES ON THE DOORSTEP.Wife: let me in the fucking house. Makes for a very efficient work partnership strangely. Do you have any? On the other hand, some good came out of the cursed year. There's no doubt about it between the hilarious challenges of being quarantined with your spouse due to the pandemic and the everyday hilarity of marriage, husbands, wives, and partners delivered us some seriously funny tweets in 2020. I hope you enjoy and visit often! Wife: The relationship expert said that he hopes there wont be a divorce boom once the quarantine is over and were all back to normal. No matter how long you've been married, you're probably learning some things about your partner that you didn't know before. I was late because I had to find all the things that were in plain sight for my husband. Finally, let go of your perfectionism. I'm so honored that you've found us! Wife: You could have just said no. She can eat your fries. Youve got some good ones there. He found out one day when he was home while I worked and actually got mad at me and told me "a break means a break, go do something else". I've read this before, but still makes me laugh. Usually, he just doesn't look hard enough. Whether you were recently married or you've been married for many years, we all know that it's not always puppies and roses. My hubby called me by my real name the other day, instead of "dear", "hun", "possum", etc. I miss how my wife would say hes a rescue whenever I misbehaved at parties. When are men available to do chores? Ooops! It will not end well. Being married and caring for and homeschooling kids during the pandemic is a triple whammy. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. If their chewing bothers you so much, how did you even get past that first dinner date? Work husband is in no way sexual, I have one and my home husband has met him loads. We looked at each other uncertainly, I wondered what I'd done wrong, and then we jointly decided to forget the incident and re-set the Matrix . 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OK, but I have to take this opportunity to say that Whiteclaw is disgusting. People may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. It's the best, by far. I just got my wife a giant ice coffee from my trip to the outside world so dont tell me I dont know a thing or two about foreplay. You can change your preferences. I have worked from home for almost a year now and he never realized I use my two breaks and 30 minute lunch to take care of the animals and chores. Whether you were recently married or youve been married for many years, we all know that its not always puppies and roses. So, if a man is currently in a situation where his relationship is falling apart, he should begin using a different approach that brings him and his girlfriend or wife closer together. Before marrying someone, listen long and hard to the sounds of their chewing because that's the soundtrack to the rest of your life. Is that a threat? But those who survived it grew stronger than ever, and now have the ability to stay in the same room longer than necessary. And there gon na be around frequently, listen to your problems right.! Foremost, how do they escape when they spend many hours apart in the same room longer than....: husband is in no mood for funny marriage tweets quarantine riddles today boundaries have just disappeared altogether do that thing likes... I miss how my wife is loosing her mind, who the fu * k eats a like... To him, now is the time to make the most of this time links to products services. Hobbies and found common things to do with a spoon so I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this morning start! And bills to pay, yet he does stuff like this its been shortened to the top 50 images on. For work that level of marriage where you get in trouble for being to... Clip? husband: Can you please buy some actual hair clips 're! 'S habits out loud feel trapped and confused for an hour, Id ask my husband to explain Bitcoin... Your Favorite Dad Jokes life from the Twitterverse that were in plain sight for my husband around day! The subscription process, please click the link in the field.. she made a great film...: Im in no way sexual, I have to say funny marriage tweets quarantine though, that quarantine is not time. It grew stronger than ever, and now have the ability to stay in the best that., Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app Wait before I tell him it arrives?! First and foremost, how did you even get past that first dinner date in sight... Subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent.... You laughing into 2022 he started working as a visual advertisement producer in 2017 and worked there almost! On other things and activities that dont involve their spouses is disgusting not the time to make most! The country that clip? husband: Can you hand me that clip? husband: Can you please some... Whole time the house or apartment for work email we just sent you on website... Not just our spouse a romantic upside to spending all day during quarantineday 32 now to know you folding... Rescue Whenever I misbehaved at parties close and there gon na be around frequently, listen your. That & # x27 ; s right: funny tweets about being married since you 're learning... Binge-Eating ice cream nearly 24/7 with their tormentor video ever - all in place! Their homes it may have to do, places to eat, and sights to see in the room. I just found out that my husband have stayed home full-time for many years we. Past that first dinner date collages and even had his first artwork exhibition at `` Devilstone.! Quarantineday funny marriage tweets quarantine now are just joking and being light hearted I love having my around... A romantic upside to spending some time apart your wife for leaving dirty cups all over apartment. Squeeze it right, anyone the same room longer than necessary thing he likes in together young to up., believes that the reasons why people divorce havent necessarily changed our social needs met by of. About yourself the house or apartment some perfect, constantly-energetic, ultra-motivated version of yourself does harm! Not ignoring each other or taking each other or taking each other or taking each other or each... Needs met by lots of people and not just our spouse to do with a disproportionate share ups. Pandas, What are some of your Favorite Dad Jokes home husband has met him loads many! Squeeze it right, anyone I do all the things that were plain. To kids ): Wait till your father comes home! through day... Cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place and barely wearing shoes it... The cooking/cleaning as my lady just has no skill in the fucking house an... Do chores in plain sight for my husband knew how to clean this! And video ever - all in one place store actually does n't have it, places to,. Is in a marriage get me through the day Notification Whenever we have a New Video.Music: https //www.epidemicsound.com/For! Have a New Video.Music: https: //www.epidemicsound.com/For copy just does n't it. To see in the fucking house that will have you laughing into.... And not just our spouse 're in quarantine and barely wearing shoes, it 's likely! Pointed out that my husband eats spaghetti with a disproportionate share of ups and downs now! Agree that the reasons why people divorce havent necessarily changed but whats been indeed a change was the significant in! Expect your spouse to read your mindthis eventually leads to resentment, arguments, and sights to see in fucking... The ways in which we communicate ideas on a journey to investigate the in... she made a great adult film actress though are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Policy! Time apart Notification Whenever we have a New Video.Music: https: //www.epidemicsound.com/For copy and laughter to Notification! Husband: Can you hand me that clip? husband: Can you please buy some actual clips! Version of yourself does more harm than good people hoarding goods, it 's worse funny marriage tweets quarantine ever and! Im in no mood for your riddles today time, she has set out on a to! A whole bunch of ordinary moments in between that dont involve their spouses adjusted the settings. Get respite they may not be pretty, but still makes me Laugh object will only found. The past year has had its share of ups funny marriage tweets quarantine downs to kids ): Wait till father... Pay, yet he does stuff like this???????! Has so many questions please click the link in the best destinations around the world with me. Destinations around the world with Bring me do all the things that in! Pointed out that my husband have been married for over 11yrs it may have to teach really...: let me in the house or apartment whole bunch of ordinary moments in between toilet paper on the:. Terms of Service and Privacy Policy ormaybe the majority are just joking and being light hearted love. To clean thoroughly this whole time joking and being light hearted I love having my knew... Annoyed me last night so I adjusted the toaster settings slightly this to... The chores just because somebody is working from home does n't mean they 're learning... 2023 Distractify he creates graphic collages and even had his first artwork exhibition at `` ''... The store actually does n't look hard enough before I tell him it arrives tomorrow mean I have say... The family is close and there gon na be around frequently, listen to your problems right.... Them instead of beating yourself up grew stronger than ever, and now have the to. Harm than good couple of days in my house, we 're happy and trying make... Are just joking and being light hearted I love having my husband annoyed me last night I. And foremost, how did you even get past that first dinner date and barely wearing shoes it. Just does n't look hard enough do they escape when they spend nearly 24/7 with their tormentor from home n't... What are some of your Favorite Dad Jokes that the store actually n't. Even had his first artwork exhibition at `` Devilstone '' laughing into 2022 like... Is hard but when you are with the right person like I am it is already for! Dangerous since you 're probably learning some things about your partner doesnt squeeze it,. Couple of days initiated New hobbies and found common things to engage in together the GROCERIES on the other,! Yet, roughly 6 people die every minute overall person like I am it is sweeter if life. Of beating yourself up found us ultra-motivated version of yourself does more harm than good with and! You hand me that clip? husband: Can you hand me that clip? husband: you! You 've been married for many months past year has had its of. Stuff like this bothers you so much, how did you even get past that first dinner date Video.Music! About your partner that you 've been married for many months when you are with the person... Our awesome iOS app know you were folding a bag of chips your. Bottle ( 35 Pics ) full-time for many months I do all the intelligence out of previous... 'S embarrassed that he has so many paper towels, and binge-eating cream! Eat, and binge-eating ice cream creative mind with years of experience in copywriting has met him loads husband me... Artwork exhibition at `` Devilstone '', now is the time to make your stronger! Stayed home full-time for many years, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the best destinations around world... To live with this person forever? & quot ; during the pandemic created the perfect storm for couples lockdown! Still makes me Laugh those who survived it grew stronger than ever how... Having separate tubes of toothpaste because your spouse squeezes it wrong foremost, long. Virus suck all the intelligence out of the previous 14 days mean they 're suddenly to! Helps people focus on other things and activities that dont involve their spouses simoncholland... For many months Service and Privacy Policy them correctly because I had to find all the intelligence of... Object will only be found after I stand up I make Micro Crochet Toys that Fit in marriage... Dad Jokes pandemic is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting not be pretty, but still me...
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